


How May I Take Your Order?

by magicspills



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Enjoy!, I Just Needed To Write This, M/M, Please Don't Take This Seriously, fast food au that nobody asked for
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-25
Updated: 2018-07-25
Packaged: 2019-06-16 07:50:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15432390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magicspills/pseuds/magicspills
Summary: Simon and Baz work in opposite fast food joints that practically forbids them from being together and they've had enough with sneaking around so they take matters into their own hands.





	How May I Take Your Order?

**Author's Note:**

> I saw this post on Tumblr which is basically a Carry On fast food crossover so I got inspired to write it! Please don't take this seriously, but nevertheless enjoy!

BAZ

The smell of grease and salt is enough to make even the most strongest of men cower away in disgust and hate. I don't bother trying to cover up my distaste for working here. The boss knows I'm only doing this for rent and schooling. 

“Baz, get your head out of the clouds and cook,” Dev's voice is loud, and getting on my nerves. For the past hour he's been barking orders at me, making me flip the burgers and throw the fries into the deep-fryer. “We need more patties and don't slack on the salt.”

Like I would slack on the salt. This franchise is practically built on a throne of salt and carbs, without the all the grease and preservatives, this company would not survive. My plain distaste for the food doesn’t stop me from throwing a bag of frozen fries into the fryer and watching the oi begin to boil, and the smell is strong. As I’m watching the fries cook, the gold in the oil makes me think of him.

Gold skin, speckled with moles and bronze curls that fall over his simply ordinary blue eyes. I smile and my mind begins to wander, thinking of him. There’s loud beeping noise that pulls me from my thought and I look at the clock. Right on time.

I don’t bother taking out the fries.

“My shift is done, boys,” I smirk and pull the McDonald’s blue cap off my head in the most dramatic way possible. It’s a whole broadway show. Dev and Niall roll their eyes when I take a bow, heading out the door. But not before I point towards the deep fryer.

“I’m pretty sure those are burning,” I smile, and make my exit. “Bye!”

“Pitch, you wanker!” Are the last words I hear when I slam the door. I know exactly where I’m going. I don’t hesitate crossing the street, towards the familiar red building.

I take a once-over to make sure I covered the blue uniform I’m wearing so they don’t notice and I end up getting my ass kicked out.

The smell of chicken and burger takes over my sense of smell the second I step foot in the air-conditioned building of Wendy’s. They look more busy than McDonald’s. I can barely see the front counter.

He’s probably working the cash register. Of course. 

Everyone wants a peak at my bronze haired Adonis.

He looks so normal, and so full of life when he takes people’s orders. He doesn’t get agitated or look like he’s about to bite someone’s head off. He gladly helps people with their precise orders; no lettuce on this, a little bit more tomato on that. He never raises when people complain about how cold their fries are, or how their burger looks undercooked. He gladly allows people to complain his ear off, and he does it with a bright smile too.

His eyes catches mine and I see his smile grow bigger. I’m sitting the farthest away from the front counter, in a booth with a good view. Snow looks at the clock and I see a sigh of relief wash over his face. He takes off the Wendy’s cap and disappears into the back.

When he finally comes out, his face is red and he’s wearing a green hoodie. 

“Let’s get out of here.” He says and leaves the restaurant as quickly as he can as if his life depended on it. I smile and follow after him, leaving the smell of burning grease and carbs behind.

_

We’re in the back of his old pickup truck, overlooking our small town, holding hands. Simon has his head resting on my shoulder. It’s the perfect night to be whoever we want, with no one to judge.

“Imagine if one of them caught us right now,” Snow says out of the blue, his voice sounds so distant like he’s been thinking too much. “Wouldn’t that be something.”

It’s not a secret that Mcdonald’s and Wendy’s have had a long lasting feud, being two of the most popular fast food chains in our small town. It doesn’t help they both in same proximity of each other, they’re literally across the street from each other. My boss doesn’t like competition, he’s always complaining and quite frankly it’s gotten on everyone’s nerves.

“Wendy’s food is nothing but carbs loaded with diabetes,” he’d say, staring at the restaurant with a glare.

“But our shit is even worse than theirs.” Dev would say so that I’m the only one listening. He’s right. Mcdonald’s a landfill of calories and heart attacks.

And people will still continue to eat it, regardless of how many warning labels there are.

“We should just quit while we’re still breathing,” I say, “I don’t know how much grease I can take.’

Snow laughs, ad I feel him shake his head. “Where would we go?”

I think for awhile, because even though the thought of leaving our shitty jobs behind sounds like a great idea, there is still the part as to where we would go. I still have school, and Snow enjoys being around people and food. 

And then, the idea hits me.

“I think I have an idea.” I smile, and he looks at me with a smile that makes me fall in love with him all over again.

_

“If you walk away now, you can never come back!” He’s practically spitting at me. I’ve never seen him look this angry, even during rush hour, he always looks so calm.

“We’re in a public place, at least try to look professional.” I say with a sneer. I’m trying to wipe the tables, and he’s been following me around for ten minutes, trying to get me back.

I don’t want to come back.

“I need you, you were one of the best I’ve had!” He’s practically on his knees by now.

“I like it here,” I say, looking down at him. I can see everyone in the restaurant, staring. I really wish they wouldn’t.

“There is nothing here for you, don’t you see? Please Baz, come back.” He’s going on and on about the food here is in poor quality, and how I would regret not coming back, but I stop him before he can continue.

“You’re wrong,” I say, “There is something for me here.”

And then the doors to the kitchen swings open and my boss stands there like deer in front of headlights. Snow stands there, his bronze curls peeking out from the hat that comes with the uniform.

“Is there something wrong?” Snow asks, and my old boss shakes his head.

“Then I suggest you leave, because you’re driving our customers away.” I say to the man who I used to work for. He gives me a glare and for a split second, I think he’s about to punch me but he throws his big arms in the air and leaves the restaurant.

“You think he’ll come back?” Simon reaches for my hand and I shake my head. Something tells me he wouldn’t be coming back anytime soon.

“I don’t think so.” I say, and Simon smiles and reaches up to give me a quick kiss on the cheek.

“Good,” he smiles and lets go of my hand. “Because you’re needed at the drive-thru.”

The drive-thru isn’t as busy as I thought it was, but there is still a line forming. I see Snow smile at me from the register as I put on the headset and I speak into the microphone.

“Hi, welcome to Dairy Queen, how may I take your order?”


End file.
